


Holding onto memories

by OverlyInvestedFangirl



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Hurt, Oneshot, Oneshot contest, Romance, Spring Fling, change, platform ❾¾, season
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:40:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24700207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OverlyInvestedFangirl/pseuds/OverlyInvestedFangirl
Summary: The changes of a season include more than merely weather and plant life, and for better or for worse the changes happen. We can appreciate and accept the changes or we can refuse to, but that doesn't necessarily mean the pain goes away with acceptance, something Hermione is struggling with.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Charlie Weasley
Comments: 5
Kudos: 19
Collections: A Spring Fling Oneshot Contest June 2020





	Holding onto memories

**Author's Note:**

> We would like to a knowledge that the characters, any plot or locations that are from the series do not belong to us. They belong to JK Rowling and we are not profiting from this story in any way.
> 
> This is a part of an ongoing Oneshot contest on the Facebook group Platform ❾¾

A flicker in time, a brief moment of bliss, the span of an experience. What if these were measured in another way than minutes and hours and days. A season of emotions, how would you measure that? 

Bliss, a dream lost. Memories seen behind closed eyes. A burning fire of intensity, of recklessly falling for dreams and visions of a future without the chain between them breaking. But it didn't just break, it burnt any bridge there ever was between them despite what they had said to each other. 

Still, she held those times close to her, but it was getting harder to hold on to them, to hold on to who they were then not this cold shell she had become alone. Keeping the dreams close, keeping the lessons learned, it was hard to keep coping. 

Not like she was fooling anybody was she, this time anyway. After the war she tried to hide how much she was being affected, which cost her a lot. Friendships grew apart but life wasn't a game where you could reset so eventually she reached out. This time people knew, they had picked up her tells, figured out when Hermione was losing the battle with herself. 

It wasn't something others had gone through though, this wasn't affecting the entirety of Britain. Just her. Not that she could tell anyone anyway. They had agreed it would be better. If it were to be ending then revealing it would be nothing but further grief. 

At least everyone not knowing gave her a way to take the loss with a grain of salt. She still had her privacy, Molly wasn't bearing down her every second questioning it all. Not sharing it with anyone at all however meant that it festered within, eating at her slowly and painfully. 

She tried to hold on, fight away the rolling clouds, but it was hard to keep doing it when you were holding on to a time where you were happy. When the present was far from how then felt like. She couldn't seem to bring herself to cross the river of her own making, compiled of memories and things no longer there. 

He had been back for a brief visit, things weren't busy at the sanctuary so they made him use up some of his accrued leave. Molly of course was ecstatic to have her son home for spring, fretting that he wasn't getting enough to eat at the sanctuary and going overboard on cooking while he was at home. 

Hermione was at the burrow whenever she wasn't at the Ministry, relishing in the presence of family. The Weasley brood and Harry were like siblings, Molly and Arthur like parents. It was different with Charlie, having had so little interaction with him. There was an automatic fondness for him being one of the Weasley’s, but there lacked any familial ties, no pre-established sibling comradery as there was with the others. 

He was warm, intelligent, and funny. Kind, cheerful, hard-working and helpful. It was hard to resist the blossoming feeling that had sprouted. His smile pierced her defenses, his laugh shattered doubts, whatever it was she couldn't keep away. They spent hours talking about dragons and other various aspects of their jobs, both working with magical creatures provided plenty of topics. 

They learnt about each other through days of errands around the burrow from Molly, dinners filled with reminiscent chatter, and evenings stargazing while discussing all manner of things. One particular night they got everyone to join in on their debate regarding the logistics of a bear in space after Hermione had pointed out Ursa Major. They were times she remembered fondly, joyous and happy times. 

Eventually, the realisation that there was a mutual attraction between the two occurred, and so they decided to have some fun while they could. They had no shame or doubt about their choice, the fire between them burning away any worry. She felt like a queen, appreciated, and worshipped in the arms of her personal king even if only for a little while. 

While her work was ever-present, the idea of his was stubbornly kept in the back of their minds, unspoken of except in the past tense. Things that had already happened but never what the future there may bring or even what was occurring there right now. Though inevitable, they pretended he didn't have to go back. They pretended they weren't lying when either talked like there was a future for 'them'. 

She had sworn to herself that she could do it, told Charlie she would be fine when he questioned if this was a good idea. He said he didn't want to hurt her, that it wasn't worth it if he hurt her, so she lied. It was too late by that stage, she believed it would be worth it. Besides what's the point in being a Gryffindor if you didn't take some reckless risks now and then. 

She was mostly right, she did it, but she wasn't really fine, a victim of her own making. She missed him, very separate lives meant it was nigh impossible to maintain anything intricate. Time and space made them grow apart, owls slowed then stopped as other things took priority. Still, he filled her dreams, the infinitesimal period each time she blinked, gone but always a part of her. She hoped he still thought of her now and then. 

Nothing would ever hold a candle to the time, for it left its lessons imprinted within, what was learned couldn't be taken away so easily though she might fear forgetting. She had spent hours going over it in her head, analysing when the emotions changed, how she could have been better. Wasting time just standing there, blankly staring out at the countryside while thoughts mulled over inside each evening. 

Realistically though, she knew that change was inevitable, the seasons changed as did people. The warm summer breeze around her proving that spring was well and truly over, as much as she might wish otherwise. Though life wasn't a game where she could just rewind the clock to have the experience again. 

They had their time and that was ok, no need to waste more words or tears on something that was gone, it might still hurt but the memories deserved appreciation not sorrow. She would get through this, the river would be crossed and life would go on. Most importantly she would hold on. 

**Author's Note:**

> The writer would like to thank you for reading and commenting and they hope you enjoy the story


End file.
